I am a horrible blogger. Seriously, i have these great ideas and goals, but nothing ever comes out of them. I never seem to be able to put this poor, neglected blog at the beginning of my "to-do list". Not that I have even been organized enough lately to make a to do list...
In any case, one of the problems I think that I have been having is that I am not really being me on this thing. I'm trying to present some made-up ideal of who I want everyone to think I am.... who I want to be, rather than just being honest and accepting the me I am.
I am in some desperate need of some serious inspiration in my life. I've been depressed and run down for the last few months. There is a little voice in my head that keeps telling me I already have everything that I need to be happy... and I am desperately trying to ignore her. If I already have everything I need then my depression is on me.... and I'll have to do something about it. Seems much easier and a way lot less work to try to live in ignorance.
But that's not who I am either. I'm a problem solver. I thrive on finding solutions when no one else can. Not to mention the fact that my husband and son deserve so much more than a wife and partner who is not even trying any more. Heck, I deserve so much more.
So here it is, the new me.... maybe being more honest here will be a jumping off point for the rest of the parts of my life!
ps - spell check found no misspellings the first time through.... maybe things are a' changing! haha
Changing Plans….
Today is my 2nd wedding anniversary. As I sit here and ponder this new life, I have to chuckle a bit.
I was never one of those little girls who dreamed of her wedding one day. It never occurred to me as a child. I dreamed of having a job, going away to college, maybe living in a big city; but never of this life or that big white dress.
Then I met my husband, and everything changed. All of a sudden I knew I was meant to be his wife and we were meant to be a family. It was actually a little bizarre at the time. I remember thinking to myself that I was falling hard for this new guy, but being scared. For the first time I realized that letting myself love and be loved meant giving up all my old dreams. Well maybe not giving up, but definitely re-writing.
The funny thing is he never wanted to get married. He said to me again and again that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with me, but for some unexplained reason I needed it to be “official”. So he finally popped the question. Of course once engaged he was going to go all out with the wedding. I tried to talk him into eloping somewhere… just having it be our immediate family and nothing fancy. Ah changing dreams….
Two years ago today we stood in front of 150 of our closest friends and family and had the full shindig… big white dress and all. I would not trade it in for anything in the world!
To my wonderful hubby – thanks for being you and letting me be me… for making me get that big dress… for loving me no matter what… for dragging me all across this country… for letting me get the crazy dog… for our beautiful son and for our even better than I could have imagined life!
I was never one of those little girls who dreamed of her wedding one day. It never occurred to me as a child. I dreamed of having a job, going away to college, maybe living in a big city; but never of this life or that big white dress.
Then I met my husband, and everything changed. All of a sudden I knew I was meant to be his wife and we were meant to be a family. It was actually a little bizarre at the time. I remember thinking to myself that I was falling hard for this new guy, but being scared. For the first time I realized that letting myself love and be loved meant giving up all my old dreams. Well maybe not giving up, but definitely re-writing.
The funny thing is he never wanted to get married. He said to me again and again that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with me, but for some unexplained reason I needed it to be “official”. So he finally popped the question. Of course once engaged he was going to go all out with the wedding. I tried to talk him into eloping somewhere… just having it be our immediate family and nothing fancy. Ah changing dreams….
Two years ago today we stood in front of 150 of our closest friends and family and had the full shindig… big white dress and all. I would not trade it in for anything in the world!
To my wonderful hubby – thanks for being you and letting me be me… for making me get that big dress… for loving me no matter what… for dragging me all across this country… for letting me get the crazy dog… for our beautiful son and for our even better than I could have imagined life!
Friday Weigh In
Well another week down and another weigh in. I ate well this past week and exercised every day, but I did not log points once all week. Plus I have candy corn in the house... which means I sneak a mini handful at least twice a day! This week's numbers are as follows:
Current Weight = 206.4
Weekly Change = 0.0
Total Weight Change = -25.4
I guess the good thing is that I stayed the same. The bad thing is that I am so not motivated to do anything different. I have a goal and I am still only half way there, but at the same time I can't seem to make any more significant changes. The tired part of my brain keeps whispering that 25 pounds in one year is enough..... but that is a slippery slope I am trying not to fall down!!!
Current Weight = 206.4
Weekly Change = 0.0
Total Weight Change = -25.4
I guess the good thing is that I stayed the same. The bad thing is that I am so not motivated to do anything different. I have a goal and I am still only half way there, but at the same time I can't seem to make any more significant changes. The tired part of my brain keeps whispering that 25 pounds in one year is enough..... but that is a slippery slope I am trying not to fall down!!!
WorkOut Notes
I have to give a shout out to my new favorite work out video… and I am so not a person who does the work out video thing. I’m more of a go to a class so that I have an instructor there to keep me honest kind of girl.
Ever since my c-section last year, my core has been in sad, sad shape. Even taking a yoga class twice a week for the last 4 months has only done minimal help. My theory is that my core has been so weak that all my other muscles have gotten all too good at compensating. So even though I thought I was working on core strength, I was really just getting by: meaning that my hips and back have still been hurting… even with losing 25 pounds and exercising just about every day.
This past weekend I decided I needed a new plan. While wandering around Meijer’s doing my normal grocery shopping on Saturday, I picked up the “Core Fusion PilatesPlus” DVD from Exhale. I’ve only done the work out twice, and really only 3 of the segments; but I have to say I like it already.
The best part is that the DVD is broken into 5 10-minute work outs. You can run the whole thing or just pick and choose. Since I don’t have time to do a 50 minute workout, I’ve been doing the last 3 segments. Even after the first day, I noticed a difference. Plus it has just made me so much more aware of my core. I now keep it tight and working all throughout the day. My hips and back are starting to like it too! =)
The work outs are challenging, but doable. They make sure to give you advanced and beginning moves through out, as well as reminding you on proper form and what you should be doing to achieve the best results. The pace is good and I’ve worked up a sweat every time.
A quick online search today found Exhale’s website. They have spa and classes in many locations. I have never visited any, so I cannot speak to how they are. Here is their website so you can check out more info on the DVD and core fusion program: http://www.exhalespa.com
This and That...
Hi All -
It's been kind of hectic around my homestead lately. Nothing much to report, just one of those times when there's always something that needs to be done. Of course a nice round of fall colds that we all are sharing is not helping the matter! At least it has been fairly minor and the hubby and I seem to have coordinated our sick days well and not both been down at the same time!
I thought I would share a few odds and ends that I have been collecting lately....
While flipping through the Sept 2010 issue of Better Homes and Gardens, I spotted a quick little blurb on "Safe Plastics". Since having my little one I am always on the look out for help in identifying which plastics I can use for what, specially when it comes to food storage. The article pointed out that you can use the Recycle Code on the plastic as a general guide: "Those labeled 1, 2, 4, and 5 are safer; 3, 6, and 7 less safe". Thanks BHG!!!! www.bhg.com
Also, while on vacation in Traverse City MI I found two very cool stores... which have websites! yea!!! The first one is the NEST of Grand Traverse. It has cool, traditional and funky house hold stuff as well as gift ideas. I love the coffee mug towers! Check them out at www.NESTofGrandTraverse.com.
The second shop is Holiday Traditions inc. Again what I would describe as household decorating stuff and gifts. I got my niece an adorable elephant doll for Christmas. Don't let the name fool you though... when they say Holiday, they mean all of them year round... not just the December one! Their website is www.HolidayTraditionsTC.com.
Hope you all enjoy these as much as I do! =)
It's been kind of hectic around my homestead lately. Nothing much to report, just one of those times when there's always something that needs to be done. Of course a nice round of fall colds that we all are sharing is not helping the matter! At least it has been fairly minor and the hubby and I seem to have coordinated our sick days well and not both been down at the same time!
I thought I would share a few odds and ends that I have been collecting lately....
While flipping through the Sept 2010 issue of Better Homes and Gardens, I spotted a quick little blurb on "Safe Plastics". Since having my little one I am always on the look out for help in identifying which plastics I can use for what, specially when it comes to food storage. The article pointed out that you can use the Recycle Code on the plastic as a general guide: "Those labeled 1, 2, 4, and 5 are safer; 3, 6, and 7 less safe". Thanks BHG!!!! www.bhg.com
Also, while on vacation in Traverse City MI I found two very cool stores... which have websites! yea!!! The first one is the NEST of Grand Traverse. It has cool, traditional and funky house hold stuff as well as gift ideas. I love the coffee mug towers! Check them out at www.NESTofGrandTraverse.com.
The second shop is Holiday Traditions inc. Again what I would describe as household decorating stuff and gifts. I got my niece an adorable elephant doll for Christmas. Don't let the name fool you though... when they say Holiday, they mean all of them year round... not just the December one! Their website is www.HolidayTraditionsTC.com.
Hope you all enjoy these as much as I do! =)
Friday Weigh In
My sister and I have been doing a Fitness Challenge this year. We decided it was time to finally get serious about our over all health and weight issues. We both joined Weight Watchers and have been counting points and motivating each other since January. Friday morning we do our weigh ins.... so here are my numbers for today:
Current Weight = 206.8
Weekly Change = -3
Total Weight Change = -25
I've been slacking for the last month and a half and finally got myself back on track this week... hence the big loss. Now I just have to keep it up! =)
Current Weight = 206.8
Weekly Change = -3
Total Weight Change = -25
I've been slacking for the last month and a half and finally got myself back on track this week... hence the big loss. Now I just have to keep it up! =)
Picture frame gift
Here is a great idea for a quick and easy gift. I am lucky these days and always have the fall back of giving adorable pictures of my son to all those people in our lives who you never know what to give them as gifts. You know the type... great aunts and great grand parents. They rarely want anything or need anything... but I always feel like I should still get them something small at least for birthdays or what nots.
In any case, the boring picture frames were getting old... and the fancy ones are just too expesive. So I bought a nice cheap frame and dug through my scrapbooking stuff.... applied a little creativity and here you go.... a personalize picture frame that my son's Great Auntie LOVED!
DB's birthday wagon
Last week was also my son's 1st birthday. We had a big party with all the family. DB loved his cake, but of course I did not get any good pictures! I'm sure his Aunties did though and I have sent out a call to them!
Here's the best one I have. DB enjoying a wagon ride with all his balloons! I can't believe he is a year old already!
Green lake
Hi All... back from Vacation last week. I tried to post this from my cell phone, but I don't seem to be that technologically advanced yet! ha ha This was my view last Monday morning, sitting with my son snoozing on my lap. Oh what I would not give to be back there right now.
The only saving grace is that it is at least Tuesday today! Back to reality, I guess... but I still have my day dreams! =)
My sister and the Cariologist
My little sister has to go to the Cardiologist today. The whole thing seems kind of weird. She's my baby sister, she's not suppose to be dealing with this stuff yet. She's only 32!
They think she had some sort of episode this weekend. Episode... that's a kind of funny euphemism... but even now I don't want to call it what it probably really was! She blew it off as just a bad reaction to food, but with her high blood pressure and our family history of heart problems... I told her to call her Dr just in case. Thank god she did! Now we get to wait and see what the new Dr will find.
Just another reminder to us all that we only have this one body, and its always better to be extra careful with it!
Of course the funny thing is that even today, she would yell at me for calling her "my LITTLE" sister. ha ha She said she outgrew that tag a long time ago. I keep telling her she will always be my little sister... no matter how much she grows!
They think she had some sort of episode this weekend. Episode... that's a kind of funny euphemism... but even now I don't want to call it what it probably really was! She blew it off as just a bad reaction to food, but with her high blood pressure and our family history of heart problems... I told her to call her Dr just in case. Thank god she did! Now we get to wait and see what the new Dr will find.
Just another reminder to us all that we only have this one body, and its always better to be extra careful with it!
Of course the funny thing is that even today, she would yell at me for calling her "my LITTLE" sister. ha ha She said she outgrew that tag a long time ago. I keep telling her she will always be my little sister... no matter how much she grows!
Here we go again....
Its been a while since I posted anything. I view this blog as my outlet to express myself in what ever manner I may need. The past year and a half has been a fun adventure. I had a baby! A wonderful little boy who I can't believe is turning ONE this weekend. Oh my goodness where does time go?
In any case... I think its time to get my goals, hopes, dreams... and what ifs back on track. That is what I hope this blog will help me do. Of course this is only the first step of many to come.... but I am looking forward to the journey!
In any case... I think its time to get my goals, hopes, dreams... and what ifs back on track. That is what I hope this blog will help me do. Of course this is only the first step of many to come.... but I am looking forward to the journey!
Update Week 15
I have not been a very good blogger lately. This pregnancy thing is a killer. February ended with me spending 5 days in the hospital. They finally decided to put in a PICC line so that I can get fluids and nutrients 24 hours a day at home. I now have a red back pack permanently attached to me.
The good news is that I'm at 15 weeks now and the fluids and nutrients seem to be helping. Last week I even gained back some of the weight that I had lost. Plus we went to a high risk OB this week and he said that everything looks great with the baby. It is sizing exactly where it should be. Which is good news all around.
I'm still pretty tired and by the time I finish work for the day don't have much energy to do much of anything.... but I am getting stronger day by day.
The good news is that I'm at 15 weeks now and the fluids and nutrients seem to be helping. Last week I even gained back some of the weight that I had lost. Plus we went to a high risk OB this week and he said that everything looks great with the baby. It is sizing exactly where it should be. Which is good news all around.
I'm still pretty tired and by the time I finish work for the day don't have much energy to do much of anything.... but I am getting stronger day by day.
Long Time, I know
Its been a while since I've had the energy, strength and drive to even sit up and type much more than what work demands. I'm sorry for the absence, but at least I have a good excuse.
I'm pregnant! Just found out over a month ago. Its been a crazy month. Apparently god awful morning sickness runs in my family. Funny how the mom and grandma never mentioned that all those times they were hinting about grand kids and great grand kids. I've been pretty much sick since I found out. Actually before I found out. That was the tip off. I woke up one Saturday morning and felt like throwing up. I thought maybe I just needed to eat something... but it never went away. Has never gone away yet. Morning Sickness, what a joke, it should be day and night sickness!
Its been 3 trips to the ER for fluids. The last time last week and they kept me for 2 and a half days. At least the tide seems to be changing. I'm finally managing to eat some real food and even drinking water.... which is a huge improvement over this time last week.
So I'm almost 11 weeks along. I'm hoping and hoping that once I clear that 14th week the queasiness will at least go away. It will be nice to be able to get up and do something for myself once in a while!
I'm pregnant! Just found out over a month ago. Its been a crazy month. Apparently god awful morning sickness runs in my family. Funny how the mom and grandma never mentioned that all those times they were hinting about grand kids and great grand kids. I've been pretty much sick since I found out. Actually before I found out. That was the tip off. I woke up one Saturday morning and felt like throwing up. I thought maybe I just needed to eat something... but it never went away. Has never gone away yet. Morning Sickness, what a joke, it should be day and night sickness!
Its been 3 trips to the ER for fluids. The last time last week and they kept me for 2 and a half days. At least the tide seems to be changing. I'm finally managing to eat some real food and even drinking water.... which is a huge improvement over this time last week.
So I'm almost 11 weeks along. I'm hoping and hoping that once I clear that 14th week the queasiness will at least go away. It will be nice to be able to get up and do something for myself once in a while!
Some one explain this to me... please
I must admit working from I tend to watch my neighbors a lot during the day. I mean I work and they are a good distraction. In any case my neighbor across the street always makes me laugh. She is very nice and all of that, but the way she handles snow is quite entertaining. I probably need more challenging work...
In any case today I am stumped. She just finished sweeping her shrubs. I mean with a broom, knocking all the snow off of her bushes. Why on earth would you worry about snow covered evergreens? The snow kind of makes them prettier.
Let me further elaborate by saying that the snow we have out there right now, although there is like 6 inches of it, is extremely light and powdery. So its not like the she has to worry about branches being weighed down or broken. Oh and her shrubs are very nice little compact ones, that I again don't think she has to worry about. The best part to is that it is literally like 10 degrees outside not including the wind chill. Really. can't the shrubs just stay snow covered?
Perhaps she knows something I do not. Perhaps we will be having a meeting of the Knights Who Say Ni on the street. Oh no, I hope my shrubbery is up to their high standards! =)
In any case today I am stumped. She just finished sweeping her shrubs. I mean with a broom, knocking all the snow off of her bushes. Why on earth would you worry about snow covered evergreens? The snow kind of makes them prettier.
Let me further elaborate by saying that the snow we have out there right now, although there is like 6 inches of it, is extremely light and powdery. So its not like the she has to worry about branches being weighed down or broken. Oh and her shrubs are very nice little compact ones, that I again don't think she has to worry about. The best part to is that it is literally like 10 degrees outside not including the wind chill. Really. can't the shrubs just stay snow covered?
Perhaps she knows something I do not. Perhaps we will be having a meeting of the Knights Who Say Ni on the street. Oh no, I hope my shrubbery is up to their high standards! =)
Monday Weigh In
I've lost my first 5 pounds! woo-who!
This week's weight = 204.8
Loss of 1.8
Total Loss so far = 5.6!!!
That's a good way to start off a Monday!
This week's weight = 204.8
Loss of 1.8
Total Loss so far = 5.6!!!
That's a good way to start off a Monday!
Nothing like a nap...
after a lousy work day. Add in one puppy and a cozy blankie and life is not nearly as bad as it seemed 20 minutes earlier!
Don't you wish you could sleep as soundly as this... in the middle of the afternoon with t
he tv on:
Rita's First Christmas!
My puppy Rita was spoiled rotten this year for Christmas. Auntie Heidi got her this sweet pink rain coat.
Her great-grandma made the blue sweater she is modeling below:
Mommy and Daddy got her the biggest bone ever,
and grandpa got her the antlers, shown here with her auntie heidi:
I think she is happy to have the holidays finally be over with!
Her great-grandma made the blue sweater she is modeling below:
Mommy and Daddy got her the biggest bone ever,
and grandpa got her the antlers, shown here with her auntie heidi:
I think she is happy to have the holidays finally be over with!
Is it Friday yet?
Its been one of those work days today. I've not exactly felt bad all day, but I've not exactly felt great either. My recurring heartburn seems to be back. It had been a couple of weeks since the last run. The odd thing is that I have not changed what I have eaten all week. Kind of odd.
Plus work has been boring the pants off of me lately. I've been trying really hard this new year to keep busy and make the most of my job. I should be happy that I at least have one, and not take it for granted... all that jazz. The new attitude is so not working today with my body protesting all day long.
To top it off I literally have finished all the work on my desk... and I still have 45 minutes to kill. I suppose a diligent worker would use that time to research some new products or figure out a new time saving way to do something.... today all I can come up with is playing tug-o-war with my puppy and trying very hard not to think of my bed that is just 15 steps down the hall! Sometimes working from home is actually harder. If I was in the office at least I would have coworkers to talk to and my bed would not be so tempting!
Plus work has been boring the pants off of me lately. I've been trying really hard this new year to keep busy and make the most of my job. I should be happy that I at least have one, and not take it for granted... all that jazz. The new attitude is so not working today with my body protesting all day long.
To top it off I literally have finished all the work on my desk... and I still have 45 minutes to kill. I suppose a diligent worker would use that time to research some new products or figure out a new time saving way to do something.... today all I can come up with is playing tug-o-war with my puppy and trying very hard not to think of my bed that is just 15 steps down the hall! Sometimes working from home is actually harder. If I was in the office at least I would have coworkers to talk to and my bed would not be so tempting!
Monday Weigh In
Monday are my weight logging days. Let's hope they all go as well as this morning did! I am a bit of a dork when it comes to weighing myself. I always do it in my birthday suit so that the like 3 pounds of clothes are not counted. Plus you have to do it first thing in the morning when you have nothing in your stomach. Who wants any extra ounces when its time to log that awful number?
In any case.... this morning's weight is 206.6! That's a loss of 3.8 pounds. Not bad for the first week.
Oh and yes, I have a digital scale that gives my weight in tenths of a pound. I had to go digital. If I use the old fashion scales I tend to cheat and move the stupid thing around to a point on the floor where I'm the lightest! That does not work on this fancy digital one. Some thing's gotta keep me honest!
In any case.... this morning's weight is 206.6! That's a loss of 3.8 pounds. Not bad for the first week.
Oh and yes, I have a digital scale that gives my weight in tenths of a pound. I had to go digital. If I use the old fashion scales I tend to cheat and move the stupid thing around to a point on the floor where I'm the lightest! That does not work on this fancy digital one. Some thing's gotta keep me honest!
Happy New Year!
I've been lax and lazy really when it comes to this blog lately. Sorry for that. One of my resolutions this year is to be better at posting. The others are to do more of the stuff I like and want.... like crafting stuff. I spent an hour yesterday and finally started the wedding scrapbook!
The big resolution this year though is to lose weight. Well more than just the weight, I want to be healthier. I would some day like to have a family that includes more than just my hubby and puppy, which means both that I should get my body is good shape for that... and also that I should instill the good habits in me, so that I don't pass the bad ones on. Heck even puppy gained weight over this holiday season!
So I have joined Weight Watchers (WW) Online. I never bought into the WW thing... since I know losing weight is all about just counting calories and burning more than you consume. Last year when I lost 20 pounds for the wedding I just used eDiets online thing... which is a pared down online calorie counter. I'm still a little bored with the calorie counting thing... so I figured I would use the dressed up Points System that WW offers. I know its the same thing, but with WW being so popular, its easier to find food and restaurants that already have the points calculated.
I started the diet on Monday. I figured why spend a week shoving as much food as possible into my mouth and start even further in the whole today! Weigh ins are on Monday. I'll make it a point to post my journey... if nothing else but to be a motivation for me!
The big resolution this year though is to lose weight. Well more than just the weight, I want to be healthier. I would some day like to have a family that includes more than just my hubby and puppy, which means both that I should get my body is good shape for that... and also that I should instill the good habits in me, so that I don't pass the bad ones on. Heck even puppy gained weight over this holiday season!
So I have joined Weight Watchers (WW) Online. I never bought into the WW thing... since I know losing weight is all about just counting calories and burning more than you consume. Last year when I lost 20 pounds for the wedding I just used eDiets online thing... which is a pared down online calorie counter. I'm still a little bored with the calorie counting thing... so I figured I would use the dressed up Points System that WW offers. I know its the same thing, but with WW being so popular, its easier to find food and restaurants that already have the points calculated.
I started the diet on Monday. I figured why spend a week shoving as much food as possible into my mouth and start even further in the whole today! Weigh ins are on Monday. I'll make it a point to post my journey... if nothing else but to be a motivation for me!
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